It was a chilly winter evening as Joe Hawley, the lead guitarist of the band Tally Hall, crept onto the front porch of his Michigan home. The cold December air nipped at his nose as he pulled his scarf tighter, blowing a white plume into the night. His red tie peeked out from under his coat collar.
 
"Another boring Christmas alone," he sighed, pushing open the creaky wooden door.
 
Joe trudged inside, the old house groaning with each step on the hardwood floor. He shrugged off his coat and scarf, hanging them on the rack by the door. In the living room, a small tree sat in the corner, its branches sparse and meager, lit by only a few lights. A few gifts sat at its base that he'd purchased for himself as a small consolation.
 
Pulling off his shoes, Joe padded over to the kitchen in his fuzzy socks. He opened the fridge, basking in the cold light that spilled out. It held little more than some leftovers, a jar of mayonnaise, and a half-eaten pizza from two nights ago. He reached for the pizza box, then froze.
 
A strange noise echoed from the back of the house. It sounded like... hissing? Joe frowned. He knew he lived alone. The hairs on the back of his neck prickled. Heart quickening, he crept down the dark hallway.
 
As he neared the bedroom, the hissing grew louder. It took on a rhythmic pattern, almost hypnotic. Almost...seductive. Joe's mouth went dry. He reached the doorway and peeked inside.
 
There, coiled on his bed, was the most magnificent creature he'd ever laid eyes on. It was a snake, but no ordinary serpent. This one was enormous, as thick as a man's thigh, its body measuring over 20 feet long. Its scales shimmered in mesmerizing patterns of black, red, and yellow.
 
Joe stood rooted, his eyes locked on the snake's. They were golden, with vertical pupils that stared into his very soul. A forked tongue flicked out, tasting the air.
 
"Hello, Joe," a sibilant voice called out. "Merry Christmas."
 
"Wha...what are you?" Joe croaked. His guitar calloused fingers twitched.
 
"I am Kaa. I have been summoned to grant you a Christmas wish."
 
Joe blinked slowly. The snake's words echoed in his mind. "G-grant me a wish? Really? Anything?"
 
Kaa's lips curved into a reptilian smile, revealing sharp white fangs. "Anything your heart desires, Joe Hawley."
 
A multitude of possibilities raced through Joe's mind. Money, fame, power... But there was something else, a dark and shameful fantasy he'd long pushed down. Something he could never speak aloud.
 
In a flash, he made his decision. Joe lunged forward, throwing himself onto the bed by the snake. "Then I wish for you."
 
Kaa chuckled, a deep sound that vibrated through the mattress. "You want to eat me, Joe. To savor my flesh, to feel my body slide down your throat and fill your belly."
 
"How did you..." Joe's eyes were wide, his breathing fast. "It's so wrong. I could never tell anyone."
 
"But you don't need to hide from me," Kaa whispered. The snake's body undulated, muscles rippling hypnotically under scaled skin. "I know all your deepest desires. And I'm going to make them come true."
 
Almost in a trance, Joe crawled onto the bed. He stroked the smooth scales, marveling at Kaa's size. The snake's body was warm, almost hot, hissing softly. Slowly, Joe raised the snake's head to his mouth. Up close, he could see a forked tongue flicking out to caress his lips.
 
Joe opened wide, and took the snake head into his mouth. The flavours of exotic spices burst across his tongue. Sucking gently, he began to swallow, inch after inch vanishing between his stretched lips.
 
Kaa's body slid easily, squeezing through his tight esophagus. The snake's heat enveloped his gullet in silky warmth. Inch after inch compressed down his throat, stretching it wide open around impossible girth.
 
Joe caught a glimpse of the snake's eyes as they passed, glinting with amusement and lust. He tried to speak, to tell Kaa how good it felt. But all that emerged was a muffled groan.
 
With wet gulps, he took the snake deeper. Bulges moved down the column of his throat, the snake wriggling its way into his stomach. His belly swelled, the curve of Kaa's body clearly visible through his shirt.
 
Finally, the tip of the tail passed his lips. Joe sucked it in, his throat rippling as he swallowed, then let out a satisfied sigh. A huge, squirming weight settled heavily in his middle.
 
"Christmas wish...complete," Kaa's voice echoed from deep inside him. "Now, for the digestion..."
 
His middle began to gurgle and churn, warm fluids surging through his insides. The snake's body grew softer, smaller, melting into him like butter on a skillet. Joe let out a moan as his stomach lurched, acids flooding through it.
 
Excruciating heat bloomed in his gut, the digestion intensifying. It was almost too much. But the pain felt so good, so cleansing.
 
Through it all, Kaa's voice whispered to him, telling him how perfect he was, how he was made to take snakes inside him. The snake dissolved into a thick sludge, swirling through his organs.
 
With a last groan, Joe felt the last of the snake melt away, the remains absorbed into his bloodstream. He lay back on the bed, panting, his belly slightly smaller but still rounded and drum-taut.
 
"That was...incredible," he gasped, clutching his middle. Some primal sense of satisfaction filled him. It was like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders.
 
"Remember, Joe," Kaa's voice echoed one last time in his head. "I'm always with you now. And if you ever want to feel that good again..."
 
Then the voice was gone, leaving Joe alone with his thoughts. And his new hunger.
 
He rose from the bed, a smile growing on his face. He had a Christmas dinner to prepare.
 
Joe sauntered into the kitchen, already planning his next move. He planned to call off band practice for the rest of the week. He had some new eating to do.