Wikipedia:Peer review/Mackenzie River husky/archive1

Mackenzie River husky

I am requesting a peer review because I am struggling with readability of the history section. I look forward to any suggestions.

Thanks, Annwfwn (talk) 12:25, 6 August 2022 (UTC)

Hi Annwfwn! The article looks like it's coming along nicely. I'm relatively new so take my comments with a grain of salt. (And you might also want to wait for another editor to chime in.)

• History. I agree the History section doesn't read smoothly. I think one reason could be that it lacks strong topic sentences. It makes sense to put each paragraph in chronological order (after all, you're explaining the history), but within each paragraph it might work better to include a strong topic sentence that summarizes what that paragraph is going to say. I tried doing something along these lines with the first paragraph, see if you think that approach helps.
• Organization. I checked out Siberian Husky, Alaskan husky, and Alaskan Malamute and noticed they all put the description first, and history later in the article. So I did the same here to see if it works.
• Scope. Appearance and Behavior sections need to be expanded. I'd also recommend more images to illustrate the physical description. I added one. If possible, a gallery would be nice. I also want to know more about their conservation status; the article states there are very few remaining - are there efforts underway to raise their numbers? I'd like to know more details about the Canadian government's actions and how they affect this breed specifically. Are there any famous Mackenzie River huskies, perhaps acting dogs? Have they been portrayed in popular media?

I'm happy to discuss further, read again after updates, or both! Happy editing! GuineaPig_C77 (𒅗𒌤) ☕ 09:34, 22 September 2022 (UTC)

@Annwfwn: to ensure that they saw the above comments. Z1720 (talk) 00:23, 7 October 2022 (UTC)

Closing note: the nominator has not responded to the above, so I am going to close this. A new PR can be opened after the above are resolved. Z1720 (talk) 18:07, 25 October 2022 (UTC)