Posted by leonthegreat 1 year ago Report

This story is great. Interesting how things escalated.

Posted by ObsidianSnake 1 year ago Report

Thanks! Glad you liked it.

Posted by Entirely_Logical 1 year ago Report

This tale feels like an evolution of ideas you've been toying with since Last Man; with a setting of its own to build from it's allowed to ask its own sets of questions. The will of the Stars seems quite capricious and I'm certainly willing to see just where that rabbit hole leads.

Posted by ObsidianSnake 1 year ago Report

Naturally, I have a few more stories that explore these characters further. Future stories in the setting will enter new territory, but the personified aspects of the New Star will be near the center of the action before then.

Posted by Mourtzouphlos 1 year ago Report

Welp, time for another excessively long comment. Literary analysis, ho!

The first thing I'd like to note is that the mysterious magic sky hand at the beginning, coupled with the predscape tag, made me think that this was an in medias res thing, and she'd already been eaten and was just reliving her bad memories. I didn't realize otherwise until the tavern, when they mention a girl that they were having problems with (and was therefore still outside).

In addition, the time period, at first glance, seemed more renaissance than baroque, contra the gallery description. When I thought about more and looked at the details, yes baroque makes more sense, but the overall sense still remains. I believe it's due to the lack of gunpowder weapons and their associated effects on the built up environment (the guards carry halberds and the city is defended by simple walls rather than a full on bastion and glacis system), so the renaissance is the closest mostly gunpowder free era.

Not really major, but I felt it deserved a mention: United Nashian Dovy. What's a Dovy? They seem naval focused, so is it like navy? Or Duchy? Naval Duchy?

This bit ended up kind of long, (it certainly took me a while to write) but I definitely found it the most interesting thing to think about in this story, so: it seems like there's more worldbuilding going on that wasn't covered here but that everyone instory knows. When they figure out that this was all done by a star (which really gave me a jolt, Fallen London player that I am), their response was, 'but stars don't normally do that'. They were aware, in a manner that they didn't regard as particularly noteworthy, of what stars could do, and what they want to do, indicating that this was either common knowledge, or the knowledge that some people know this is common knowledge (e.g. most people aren't nuclear physicists, but they are aware that nuclear physicists exist).

Their preexisting relationship with stars probably also explains why they took the news of what happened so calmly instead of absolutely freaking out. Yes, it was a kingdom that everyone apparently hated and feared, but this star just casually destroyed and took over a major kingdom with little apparent effort, solely because a little girl made a wish. What assurances do they have that they aren't next? The response appears to be that 'I only took the bad ones', but unless you already know their criteria for good, and trust them a LOT, that's not reassuring at all, as it too easily segues into 'Rejoice! I shall cleanse your souls of heresy with fire and sword!'

I have an idea for a character (separate from here) who is a murderous, imperialistic tyrant. Would 100% throw babies into woodchippers to achieve his goals. He loves his wife, his children, and gives absolutely zero fucks about anyone else. One day, his daughter comes to him and says she wants to make the world a better place. So he goes out and becomes a benevolent peacemaker who drastically improves the lives of his subjects and is loved by all. But if she were to change her mind (she wouldn't, she wants to inherit and be a benevolent empress, but if she did)? Babies. Woodchippers. Zero hesitation. Is he a good person? There are views pointing very firmly in opposite directions.

And the diplomats are aware of this. They mention that the previous inhabitants didn't think of themselves as evil (but the vile-rats apparently objectively were, which offers some very interesting implications on the exact boundaries and definition of evil in a way that a lot of works offer and then fail to think through properly (ah, Calvinist predestination), but that doesn't come into play here), but nevertheless, by Lady Morning's standards, they were bad enough to not deserve to live (outside).

What's more, they're also aware that at least part of this is through deliberate social engineering by the ruling house - but that sort of totalitarian control is a distinctly twentieth century phenomenon, brought about the rise of mass media and the authoritarian state. The only successful example I can think of that in the pre-modern era is Sparta, and that was due to Stasi levels of informing on each other and the fact that they were a single city with a tiny population (at one point in the Peloponnesian Wars Athens captured a hundred Spartans, and Sparta started panicking at the loss of so much of its army). Most other times, it failed to be imposed past the ruler's court and their immediate surroundings, spreading or not solely on its own - i.e. was a strictly superficial facade put on to placate the ruler.

All of this means that, when faced with a power that can destroy them, has shown to decide this based on petty instigations and isolated, non-representative elements, the diplomats are incredibly unconcerned. The most likely explanations, as far as I can see, are that they already know what not to do in order to set them off, and so don't have to worry about it, or that they already know that this sort of thing can happen, and have given up trying to avoid it, instead treating it like a natural disaster (sometimes shit just happens. There's nothing you can do about it, so just keep on as best you can).

Either way, I suspect that the relationships between the stars and mortals is going to come up later, and it's going to be interesting.

Posted by ObsidianSnake 1 year ago Report

Thanks for the thought-filled comment! I'm pleased that you found the story engaging. This one's more story-heavy, so that's a constant concern of mine.

Regarding the "time period": I struggled to describe the kind of world-state we're dealing with here. I'm not surprised to see it has a renaissance-feel to it, due to the aesthetics of Bismorothian culture. The halberds are sensible symbols and standards for the constabulary to bear, as they are highly visible and reliable deadly weapons against the population that they are meant to bully, whom tended to be armed with smaller blades and clubs.

By baroque, I meant that the way that people are organized, how they approach the unknown, their overall level of technological sophistication, and the way nation-states interact. Also, some of the architecture and artwork, should it ever be described -- hopefully not in detail on a vore-centric site! No, it isn't historical baroque, as it is fantasy, but it's a best-fit. It's the vibe I'm aiming at.

On the Nashian Dovy Diplomat's reaction to The Circumstances: they are dealing with cosmic-level powers, one that are normally subtle in their touch. They don't deal, or exchange, they simply gift, on rare occasions. The best they can relate to the once-hypothetical emissary/familiar/component of a stellar being is to treat it as something akin to a deity. They view the phenomena of the Bismoroth transformation as astounding, but not certainly not bad. After all, "it seems that the war's off," perhaps as a consequence of the night-spoken wishes of everyone.

Anyway, it wasn't because one girl made a wish. No, oh no, there was three wishes, made with the best of intentions, in sequence, delayed, combining together into something new, terrifying, awesome, and world-changing. What's done, has been done.

Upon the mention of vile-rats: Fuck--where is it?!

Oh. False alarm. Sorry, I know just how bad those things are. They are optimally bad: supernaturally evil, you see, and certainly not something that naturally occurs in the normal physical world, thankfully.

On the Nashian Dovy itself: That's a regional government, a united federation of smaller states. They're a maritime society because so much of that part of the world is a temperate archipelago around a river-crossed landmass that's mostly marshy lowlands. They're merchant-oriented, with a representative government. They brew some weird drinks, like a spiced sea-asparagus ale. Blech, yet... the taste eventually grows on you.

On the future: Oh, don't worry. There's already more stories. They will appear here in time. :)

Posted by Mourtzouphlos 1 year ago Report

The time period: Yes, that sort of thing is what I meant when I said that it made sense when I thought about it more and looked deeper. If that was what you were aiming for, you hit it.

The diplomat's reaction: So it's very unlikely to happen and very unlikely to be this dramatic, so while they had known it was theoretically possible, it had never happened before, and they still figure that something like this is so vanishingly unlikely to happen to them (and impossible to predict or prepare for) that there's no point in worrying about it, and instead just focus on the immediate consequences, which are all positive.

The Dovy: Yes, but ... Dovy is a noun. What is it? What does the word mean? If I ordered one (1) Dovy, what would I get? (other than a Columbidae with a torn label)

Posted by ObsidianSnake 1 year ago Report

The Dovy is a type of democratic republic, with regional and organizational characteristics that prompt a more specific term. It also differentiates it from prior (looser) historical federations from the same area. It's also the forward name of the nation.

People are hesitant to formally utilize the term 'Republic' as a form of national identity due to Haj'v-Ayoc, which is so predominant that it's synonymous with the term. If you say 'the republic' at the barber's, folks assume that you mean Haj'v-Ayoc. But, let's not get ahead of ourselves...

Posted by Mourtzouphlos 1 year ago Report

I assume by 'forward' you mean 'formal?

Posted by FirstOf71st 11 months ago Report

Walked into this one having little to no idea what to expect, and I found it a good read after getting a handle on the premise and setting. I'm not a big fantasy-genre person, so I cared less about the worldbuilding here, but the emotional journey of Luemilla kept me engrossed. The fairytale-style wish fulfillment, a world transformed into perfection because of one's own desire is fascinating. And by that, I mean it produces a social-moral-ethical tension that beautifully enhances the vorish scenarios within it. I've come to regard this effect as your work's signature, if I'm allowed to point it out for the umpteenth time (does drawing attention to it reduce the magic? Eh, that's overthinking).

Speaking of analysis, it's also easy to read this story as an odd rearrangement of the Eanlian encounter with the fallen society of Earth featured in your other works. An alien race of (furry) non-humans descends to a ruined world and proceeds to supplant it with their own (superior?) culture (which involves vore). Also, _mustelids_.
Nothing wrong with knowing what you like!

Posted by ObsidianSnake 11 months ago Report

It did occur to me that there was a parallel between the future-modern era of Eanli stories and the events here. I figured it would be okay to repeat some thematic elements, because of the nature of the site. Anyway, Neil Gaiman has several works featuring a door-like portal to another world in which everything is uncanny, so, like... whatever, man. It's not like I'm going to do it a third time, anyway.

You know, I wasn't the biggest fan of fantasy, either. At least, that's what I believed. The foundation of this work began as a challenge, an adventure into a different genre, and I found that I enjoyed it. I ventured out of my comfort zone and was rewarded for it!