Posted by IddlerItaler 7 months ago Report

"While thinking, Cornelia was playing with the waterfall, by letting water fall in her mouth, and stretching it like a balloon, to then expulse it like a water gun."

Okay, this bit is super-cute.

Also it was interesting to see the PoV of an animal prey, including its emotions.

Posted by Trajan 7 months ago Report

Yeah, I like to think about how preds use aspects of their biology for purposes other than just being vore machines. We all did the water gun mouth when we were kids, so it seemed only natural that a pred would do it, just with a bigger mouth instead. I'm glad you found it cute.

Yeah, I liked a fair bit of animal prey. At first I was just going to shortly describe her gullet, uvula and tongue quickly, but then realized it would be a nice opportunity for a more in-depth pov. Also yeah it seemed natural to put the pov of the bird. Animal are thinking creatures after all, especially crows.

Posted by FurryTastyTreat 7 months ago Report

Cornelia is such a thoughtless pred. Prey means nothing to her, does it?

Her friendship with the eponymous old man is facinating! You write very interesting characters.

Good job!

Posted by Trajan 7 months ago Report

I mean, in this very story she did think about her preys from last story. But yeah, it is true that she doesn't really think about the lives or opinion of her preys. Nature is cruel after all, and doesn't really teach you compassion for other species, especially when those are potential meals. This is going to be a pretty realistic setting, so yeah, preds aren't really concerned with what their prey suffer (though it might change from pred to pred).

I'm glad that you liked the characters. I was really afraid that it would come out flat and boring. I have plans for them and other characters in the future, and I hope I can deliver quality-wise.

Posted by IddlerItaler 7 months ago Report

For what it's worth, nature also has stuff like herds of zebras relaxing while lions are in sight. I find scenes like the ones in this chapter to also be fairly realistic, like Cornelia thinking back to her prey and asking herself a few questions about them, and a member of a "prey" species who's been successfully hanging out with a different species.

Posted by Trajan 7 months ago Report

Yeah, the wall can and was definitly pierced. I usually go from the idea that preds won't automatically think about their preys' feelings unprompted or if they have no education on them other than "they're food" and things related to "they're food". But it can change and will change depending on the experience and life of the pred.

Here Cornelia meet face to face with a supposed prey that also happens to be an actual person that she can interact with and who is nice to her, and this basically leads her to consider more in depth what her relation is to her preys. She also isn't presented as the smartest deepest individual, and someone smarter or more emotionally inclinded than her might have had those thoughts earlier and unprompted. It however would be difficult as it would go against their culture and the reality of their life.




(Also tbh on a personal note I like it when preds just don't care about their preys, though I won't only write that and will make the scenes depending on how the story progresses.)

Posted by IddlerItaler 7 months ago Report

Personally I can enjoy those "looks down on their preys as non-people" types of preds sometimes; some societies who are exceptionally harsh exist even in my relatively-lighter setting, where they're like an Assyrians or Sparta type of deal. If Frederich is successful in his trip beyond this island I guess we'll see what things are like in the broader world.

Definitively looking forward to what you'll write next.

Posted by Trajan 7 months ago Report

Thanks for your support, I'm glad people are engaged with the story.

Posted by FurryTastyTreat 7 months ago Report

Definitely not flat and boring. Cornelia's attitude is definitely realistic and very believable.